Minor Difficulties
by RogueDragon and Nebulan
Summary: Author: Nebulan.. SG1 is a little younger and a little less sane, but the only chance the SGC has when aliens invade. Takes place during Season 8. Parody of Star Trek TNG episode Rascals.


Written by Nebulan:  
Aug 2004  
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Unscheduled off-world Traveler

Siler came running into the control center, "What's going on?"

"I am receiving SG-1's IDC." Walter reported.

"What?" Siler said, "They're nearly a day ahead of schedule."

Teal'c's voice came over the radio, "We have encountered a minor problem."

Teal'c stepped through the Stargate first. He was followed shortly by three unfamiliar people. The first was a confused man in his 20's or 30's confidently wearing a general's SG uniform. Next was a blonde, short-haired teenage girl who wore a baggy colonel's SG uniform. Last was a child with freckles, glasses and an SC uniform that was entirely too big for him.

opening credits

"I suppose I don't need to tell any of you this, but you all appear to be about 20 or 30 years younger." The doctor informed all of her patients, who were now sitting on beds in the infirmary.

"What happened?" asked Siler.

"The Stargate took us to an abandoned warehouse on the planet," preteen Daniel said in his high voice.

"While it looked completely forgotten and abandoned," Sam started explaining, "There were several things in the warehouse."

"So you just started randomly using alien devices?" Siler questioned.

"Hey," O'Neill shouted, "we were just looking, Carter opened a box and then… well, what did happen?"

"I had no idea that just touching it would trigger the effects of the device." Cater explained.

"It must have had a wide effect radius," Daniel squeaked. "I wasn't standing anywhere near Sam."

"Then why didn't it affect Teal'c?" O'Neill asked, confused.

"It did." The doctor said, standing next to Teal'c, examining him.

"Indeed O'Neill," Teal'c cocked an eyebrow, "I feel like a healthy 90-year-old again." O'Neill and Daniel cocked eyebrows too.

"General, this is exactly why I told you I didn't think it was a good idea for you to be going out on missions." Siler said.

"That's why I left you in charge." O'Neill said confidently, "you're ok, aren't you?" Siler looked confused.

"This isn't going to be… permanent… is it?" young Daniel whined.

"I don't mind if it is." O'Neill said perkily. Sam and Daniel both threw him dirty looks.

"Well I do," the doctor said sternly. "I don't like the idea of your bodies being suddenly transformed and changed in an instant, no matter what the result is."

"What concerns me," the teenager said sternly, "is if we really did find a fountain of youth…why was it locked up in the back of a warehouse."

"I'd like you all to take it easy for the next while until we find out what caused this and what other affects it has." The doctor said, looking at her notes, "what I can tell so far is that, while your brains seem unaffected, your bodies are physically younger, so the chemical imbalances that change with age may cause some emotional problems, especially in Daniel and Sam."

Sam and Daniel's faces fell to disgust, "You mean I'm going to be a moody teenager again?" Sam groaned.

"Oh come on Carter! Aren't you glad to be a teen again?" O'Neill said, "Come on, I bet high school was the best days of your life!"

Sam's next expression was one all teenagers know means, 'not really'.

"Actually," the doctor interjected, "she's more like junior high school age."

"Or… let me guess…" O'Neill said, "your social skills haven't changed much since then?" Sam just rolled her eyes.

"Well, you're all probably free to go," The doctor said. "But please stay on base," Daniel's shoulders could be seen dropping through his baggy shirt, "I'd like someone to stay and help me with some tests, if they don't mind."

"I can assist you with that doctor," Teal'c volunteered. She smiled.

"Well," O'Neill stood up, "I need to go do some paperwork. Call me if you find anything out."

After Jack left, Daniel slowly got off his infirmary bed. He bobbed a couple of differently ways before he made up his mind where he was going. Samantha stayed.

"You must be Doctor Schmidt," The doctor turned her attention from Teal'c to Sam and smiled. Sam continued. "We were out on mission when you first joined the SGC."

"It's Kayla Schmidt," she shook the teenager's hand. Kayla was an attractive woman, Caucasian with dark brown hair. "It certainly has been interesting… working here." She said in an excited tone. "I've only been here a short time and already I get to study the most amazing things! I mean, I never in my medical career thought that I would be working with a fountain of youth situation, and already I'm studying an alien!" She looked at Teal'c when she said that. When she realized what she said, she blushed, "I mean, not that it would be different…" she stuttered.

"That is understandable." Teal'c said. Sam smiled, and left the Kayla and Teal'c to their tests.

A few hours later found the young teenager in her lab working on her usual projects that usually made her happy. But she became easily frustrated with one thing or another and threw her equipment aside.

"Sam?" a voice came from the hall. Sam perked up and ran to hug her young friend. "Ahhh!" Cassandra said, "what happened to you?"

Sam laughed, "I don't know, but I hope it isn't permanent."

Cassie laughed. "Come on! We're, like, the same age, we should do something together! Let's go to the mall!"

Sam made a face, as you can imagine, the mall probably isn't Sam's idea of a good time. "I can't leave the base, we don't know what all has happened to us."

"So you're trapped here?" Cassie asked, concerned.

"Yeah, but is won't be so bad if you're with me," teen Sam said happy.

"Let's go do something crazy, like flirt with the really hot officers." The alien teen said excited.

Sam made a face, "I don't think I should hit on my fellow officers."

"Oh com'on, we'll just be friendly with them, nothing serious!" Cassandra suggested, "or maybe we could try to play some tricks on Jack!"

Sam smiled wide at that idea, and with that, the two teenage girls ran out to the rest of the base.

The door to O'Neill's office opened. The General looked up from his work to see no one at the door, but then he realized that he was looking a couple feet too high. Short little Daniel came in and plopped himself in the chair in front of Jack's desk.

"Can I help you sonny?" the general teased.

"Stop that," Dr. Jackson grumbled, "This situation may be funny for you, but I don't appreciate being treated different from everyone else just because I'm like a nine-year-old!"

"Well… you have to admit, you do have some handicaps now."

"Yeah, well, I can't reach the stuff on the top shelf, whatever, what I don't appreciate is everyone talking down to me!"

"Well, it's not like they have much choice…"

"They talk to me in a childish tone of voice and treat me like I don't know anything…" While the kid ranted, the young General nodded his head in sarcastic agreement. "I know more about ancient ruins then they will ever know!"

"Definitely."


End file.
